Choices

 



 

Owen's Lego Guys

      Sarah's top Santa request for Christmas 2011 was for girl lego characters.  She said that all of her legos sets came with way too many boys and not nearly enough girls.  A quick look at Owen's lego stash confirmed that the guy to girl ratio in Legoland is seriously tilted toward the male end of the spectrum.  His collection included ninjas, storm troopers, soldiers, and even wookies - but I couldn't find a single girl in the bunch. Imagine my surprise (after Santa spent weeks searching for girl legos) to find out the week after Christmas that Lego was going to introduce a whole new line of Legos aimed squarely at the girl demographic. Now, imagine my continued surprise to find out that parents were outraged about this new line of Legos that was pandering to girls.  Where, oh where, do I begin with this?




"Lego Sets with Boobs"

First, these parents who are outraged over legos? What's that line of discussion about first world problems?  If you have time to be outraged over a line if legos marketed for girls then you've got lots of time on your hands (see photo, left).  Second, as a parent who's raising children in a state where our legislators are introducing legislation with tag lines like "don't say  gay" (unless you're calling out your gay classmates as sinners and fornicators because that's considered freedom of religion, not bullying,  so in that case you can say  "gay" all you want too) - well, that's a reason for some parental outrage.*  But back to the Legos.  Frankly, as the mother of a son to whom Lego has been pandering to for years (see Star Wars, Ninjago, Hero Factory, and Bionicle Lego lines) I'm thrilled that Lego has wised up and developed a Friends line that panders appeals to my daughter.  And may I say bravo Lego makers for expanding your repertoire and realizing that my daughter's allowance/Christmas dollars have the same value and buying power as my son's allowance/Christmas dollars.  As for the Friends legos themselves, I think they're great.  Do they include cafes and salons and hairbows and lipstick? Yes, yes they do. Do I worry that playing with Lego lipstick and hairbows will influence my daughter to grow up to be a vapid brainless looks-obsessed woman?  Not really, at least not anymore than I worry that playing with all those Star Wars legos will influence my son to grow up to become a Sith Lord (although his love of the dark side does trouble me - in what universe is Darth Vader the hero?).  In an effort to tie all of this together, I'm going to end with a line written by F. Scott Fitzgerald that I first read when I was in college being indoctrinated with all kinds of liberal ideas.  According to Mr. Fitzgerald, "the test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function."  I'm trying to raise my children in an environment where this is possible (the holding of two opposing ideas and functioning) so they will grow up learning to respect and value the choices of others, especially when they don't agree with them.



Sarah & her Harry Potter Legos

 

Friends Cafe
 

Friends Legos on the Hogwarts Train

Legos are little miracle workers at our house.
They bridge the gender gap, the age gap and the sibling gap.

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* How troubling that there are two pieces of legisation being considered in my state that, if passed,  effectively silence a student from saying "Hey, I'm gay," while protecting a student from being considered a bully for  saying "Hey, you're gay and you're going to hell."

Left of Center

Knoxville Catholic High School
Magnolia Avenue Campus

   My high school tenure coincided with filmmaker John Hughes teen angst movie making years.  The confluence of these two events means that twenty-plus years after graduation what I remember about that time in my life is now an interesting mash up of things that actually happened mixed in with plot lines from Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, and Pretty in Pink.  These movies were such an integral part of my high school existence that it's impossible to think of one without the other.  I wore out two Pretty in Pink cassette tapes because it was the perfect soundtrack for my own angst-filled teenage existence.   The song "DON'T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME"  from The Breakfast Club was the prom theme my junior year and the prom was held the night of my seventeenth birthday (the prom was on my birthday, how cool is that!). As for my ongoing love for Sixteen Candles and the scene at the end of the movie where Jake kisses Samantha and all her birthday wishes come true - it's still dreamy, even now.

Jake Ryan.  Sigh.

May 1989
Anywhere's Better Than Here

    So, what's sparked this particular trip down memory lane? Without going into any detail at all, it turns out that being a grown-up is for the birds.  When I got home Friday night all I wanted to do was find something entertaining to watch on television and turn my brain off for awhile. Not five minutes after I started channel surfing I landed on Pretty in Pink and happily sank into a nostalgic haze. The fact that I now fondly remember my high school years would be a shock to my eighteen year old self. (See photo, right. Only hours away from being a high school graduate and I knew everything.) My favorite song in the months leading up to graduation was a little number by The Replacements called "ANYWHERE'S BETTER THAN HERE" and I vividly remember sitting through graduation just wanting the whole thing to be over with already. It wasn't until I helped organize our tenth class reunion that  I started making peace with my teenage years, and even then I had the Gross Pointe Blank soundtrack set to play on continuous repeat while I addressed envelopes and counted RSVPs (if you're unfamiliar with GPB,  it's billed as a dark comedy about a man who returns home to attend his 10th high school reunion and mayhem ensues).  By the time our twentieth reunion was on the horizon, I realized that somewhere along the way I'd gained enough distance to be able to look back at my teenage self and smile. Time had both softened the awkward edges of my high school experience and distilled my memories to a point that the good outweighed the bad.  As for the graduating class that I am privileged to be a part of, they're a great group of people.  If you are a part of this class, you know it's true. 

College Roommates
at our 20th High School Reunion

     I used to roll my eyes whenever my mother would tell me that someday I would look back on my teenage years and remember them as some of the best times of my life because, clearly, she didn't understand anything at all! (insert sarcastic tone and add a heavy sigh for emphasis).  As with so many things that my mom said to me over the years, it turns out she was right about this one. Back when I knew everything, I swore up and down that I would never say the ridiculous things to my kids that my mother said to me. Of course, all that changed once I realized the power of phrases like "because I said so, that's why!" My mother passed on a great deal of wisdom and I'd be a fool not to share it with my own offspring.  This is why I know for certain that when my children start complaining about how hard their lives are and arguing that I can't possibly understand what they're going through, I'll say to them "Yeah, I know (pause for effect) - but believe me, someday when you're all grown up with kids of your own you're going to look back on these times and remember them as some of the best years of your life. Really." And now, because I am grown up with kids of my own, I need to go do some laundry so they'll have clean uniforms to wear to school tomorrow and clean up the kitchen because it needs to be cleaned up, all while listening to the Pretty in Pink soundtrack on my iphone because it turns out that the music that soothed my angsty teen soul way back in the late 1980s is still able to sooth my angsty 40 year old soul today.  Some things never change.

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A few of my favorite John Hughes movie quotes. All but one are from the three movies mentioned above.

"Screws fall out all the time. The world's an imperfect place."


"Can I borrow your underpants for ten minutes?"

"Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?"

"Drinking and driving don't mix - that's why I ride a bike."

"Life moves pretty fast. 

If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.'

Eight

Zero

One

Two

Three

Four

Five

Also 5 & one of my favorite photos ever.

Six

Seven

(she had the flu, but we partied anyway)

Eight